Opinions, musings, ideas, pearls of wisdom
Of Reincarnation, Life and Death and Such
by Dale Chastanger
Of Reincarnation, Life and Death and Such
by Dale Chastanger
It's a cold crisp morning and I'm crossing a field to get to my favorite spot. The last obstacle is the dreaded barbwire fence. I've done it dozens of times before and I'm eager to get at it, but familiarity breeds complacency. Okay, press down on the top wire and swing my right leg high. I've got my right leg over and planted and I'm lifting my left leg to clear the top wire. My balance shifts to my planted right leg and my momentum will carry me over and clear of the unmerciful teeth of the top wire, when, at the most inopportune second, I feel a tug at my crotch. Panic strikes because inertia is now in play. There is nothing I can do to stop the inevitable because "an object in motion tends to stay in motion". I press down harder on the top strand of rusty spikes in an attempt to unhook or at least minimize the damage, but fate is now my master. As that millisecond slowly creeps forward like Keanu Reeves in "The Matrix", my mind perceives every detail, but I am powerless to alter the inevitable events in motion. As my balance is lost, caused by the unexpected hindrance of forward motion another Newtonian law (or should be one) comes into effect: "Gravity is merely a lubricant". As gravity propels me to the ground I hear the sound that I dreaded, that almost imperceptible sound that becomes a deafening roar to my heightened senses, a sound that is felt as much as heard, a distinct, and sickening, Ripppp.
Once unhooked from the rusty spike, I inspect the damages and find that my lucky waders now have a gaping hole in the least preferred location for the entry of cold water. Surveying the damage, the realization sadly settles in that this days wading will be limited to a depth no greater than my knees.
These waders have been with me for years and have been a faithful companion on many excursions. They have leaked in the past after being foul-hooked and have been patched multiple times, but alas, this wound is mortal. It is, in large part, due to this faithful companion that I attribute many fond memories over the past number of years, and tears well up when I contemplate the probability they will not be able to accompany me any longer. For a few moments I reminisce about the good times we have had and how I will miss my faithful companion, how they have protected me from frost, snow, mud and hypothermia. Then suddenly, (Insert sound of a phonograph needle being drug across a vinyl record), my mind is transported in a flash back to the fly shop and I remember that new model of guide grade waders that I was drooling over last week. Now it's not like I need an excuse (or at least that much of one) when I talk to my wife about how important it is that we spend the money for a new pair of waders in order to protect her beloved from the harsh, cruel elements encountered in the wilds of the river, defending him from disease and illness, recounting the importance of the expenditure and the rationale for the price of a quality pair verses the cheaper brand. (Okay, my wife didn't buy it either, but she let me get them anyway.)
So, I come home from the store with the new pair of Swiss-Army waders that have all the new cool snaps, buckles, accoutrements and doodads. But what do I do with my old expired pair? There are many fond memories of the rich times spent together. There have not been many people that have gotten closer to me or been as close a friend than my waders and I can't bear to just throw them away. After all, they are my...close companion. Throwing them in the garbage just doesn't seem the right thing to do to an old friend. Not to mention it's not environmentally sound to dump them in the landfill.
Now, I'm not an enviro-nazi, but this makes good sense. There is a company appropriately named Recycled Waders that will take your beloved breathable waders and recycles them into practical repurposed gear for your fishing and non-fishing adventure. If you send them your old waders they will, for a modest price, recycle them into the product, or products of your choosing and send it back to you. Or, you can donate/ship your old waders to them to be repurposed for someone else by turning them into wallets, Messenger Creels, 'Nook Sacks and Big Fanny packs. Check out Recycled Waders at: www.recycledwaders.com.
If you have neoprene waders or wetsuits to recycle check out: http:ecologicaldesigns.com.
It's great to be able to take my old friend fishing again. By the way, the funeral service at the landfill has been canceled.